I'm sitting here celebrating my last day of freedom before I start a temp job. I have almost given up thinking I would get a permanent job (and definitely not at the University) Yes, I seem to have developed anger issues with a University that thinks it's God's gift to the Universe. I mean they pay their head football coach over 6 Million a year but can't seem to remember to hire people who need jobs. (long long story).
But I wander. The fact that I start work tomorrow made me think about other jobs I have had in February.
My best memory is when I worked at this little bookstore with my best friend Hal. I actually got him hired since I worked there first. It was originally down in south South Austin and I was happy when they moved. However the choice (although about a mile or two from our house) was ideal - the choice was terrible for a book store. It was linked with a gift store and a card store and the owner put them all in one huge storefront. In a virtually empty outdoor mall. While it was never busy, we got to read, hang out with the manager (really cool fellow named Robert) and eat at the little Bistro behind us which had the best Mulligawney Soup and a Queen Victoria cake that was sooooo good. One Febrauary - Austin got ice and snow so the whole city closed right down. (A tendency in central and southern Texas towns.) Eeek! Snow - they say and all life stops. So Hal and I - growing bored at home after two and a half days - suited up and walked to the store in the pretty empty city. We got there made hot drinks and settled in for a few happy hours of reading, cleaning and just generally seeing things outside other windows. So who walks in but Robert who was tired of being home as well. We got customers who also were bored. Still a nice day. (The store and it's other paired stores (the cards and the gifts) were eventually sold to what became a mega store by the mismanaging owner who had no business sense at all).
My other memory of work and February is the second day of work at the University. I got there only to have them shut it down for a sever ice storm. I managed to get on the last shuttle home and what normally takes 10 minutes to travel to home, took close to an hour. Then I had to walk on the icy street with the crazy drivers. The following year we had 80+ degree weather.
This year the weather has been wet but not too bad. I will enjoy the foray out with real people who want me to do something. I will hopefully feel appreciated out there in the workplace. It will be good.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Monday, January 9, 2012
The sinister cedar
Every year about this time, I start hating trees. Not all trees - just the ones who make my life miserable for a month or so. You wouldn't think a tree could attack and win over thousands of people... knocking them low to where they lie in their beds, wishing they were dead. You hear people on the bus, in the office or classroom, hacking, sneezing and basically looking like dead warmed over.
Enter the Mountain Cedar... (Juniperus ashei ) who during the months of December through May court and spark with the male trees dumping their pollen over the neighborhood in hopes of fathering baby cedars. And its no light dusting. The trees can easily look like they are on fire with the amount of pollen they dump. Nor is it the occasional tree. Think crab grass, or lawn weeds and you have an idea of how many we have in Austin and the Hill Country. They have other bad habits as well - they absorb huge amounts of our ground water - especially during droughts.They choke out native hardwood trees and Blackland Prairie grasses. I think the one good thing about them is they provide shelter for songbirds in our areas.
But in the months of December through February they are the deadliest of trees. I think of this as I sit sneezing and feeling the pollen creeping into my body.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
For 2012 - new thoughts
Well 2011 was a year of change and new directions. I lost my job, developed severe mobility issues, graduated from college and started doing more artwork. So some good and some not so good. I hesitate to say bad because I think the actions aren't over and I feel like I don't entirely know the outcome.
I try to view change as not good or bad really. Or rather I try to view it as potentially good. I mean when I got laid off I really thought that suddenly My Life As I Knew It would drastically change and we would be living in a cardboard box - three cats, the sweetie and me - and we still are (knock wood) where we started. That's a great good thing to me. I got to do interviews, apply for work and get around surprisingly well despite the pain and the feeling that I should be doing more. But the pain is teaching me to look at what I have to do - if I can do it - and it's teaching me to accept help graciously and with the idea that I have given to people and now get back.
So 2012 is going to commence in a relatively short time. Last years goals were somewhat met. I had to go look them up and found there were 4 and I re posted them here for me to think about.
1. Pay more attention to my health and physical well-being.
2. Work at doing art.
3. Get my ETSY shop going.
4. (the big one) Go to the Doctor and Dentist.
I did do 2 and 3 easily and I am paying more attention to my health - I started losing weight (20 pounds) and since I've become somewhat disabled I pay more attention to it so I guess I could say I did No 1. No 4 was more difficult. I've called my doctor and got referrals to two other doctors. I will be calling them in 2012 and see what they say. I think - while not totally perfect - I did my resolutions.
GOLD STAR for me!
So without further ado my resolutions for 2012
1. Do enough artwork to have a small show.
2. Go see the Orthopedic doctor
3. Get either some job/volunteer work to give myself more structure.
4. Lose 20 more pounds (I've lost 20 last year).
5. Get either an Illustration certification or going back to Texas State for the second part of my BFA. (Or both!)
6. Work towards becoming retired.
7. Go on some sort of vacation!
Check back with me throughout the year. I have very positive thoughts on this.
I try to view change as not good or bad really. Or rather I try to view it as potentially good. I mean when I got laid off I really thought that suddenly My Life As I Knew It would drastically change and we would be living in a cardboard box - three cats, the sweetie and me - and we still are (knock wood) where we started. That's a great good thing to me. I got to do interviews, apply for work and get around surprisingly well despite the pain and the feeling that I should be doing more. But the pain is teaching me to look at what I have to do - if I can do it - and it's teaching me to accept help graciously and with the idea that I have given to people and now get back.
So 2012 is going to commence in a relatively short time. Last years goals were somewhat met. I had to go look them up and found there were 4 and I re posted them here for me to think about.
1. Pay more attention to my health and physical well-being.
2. Work at doing art.
3. Get my ETSY shop going.
4. (the big one) Go to the Doctor and Dentist.
I did do 2 and 3 easily and I am paying more attention to my health - I started losing weight (20 pounds) and since I've become somewhat disabled I pay more attention to it so I guess I could say I did No 1. No 4 was more difficult. I've called my doctor and got referrals to two other doctors. I will be calling them in 2012 and see what they say. I think - while not totally perfect - I did my resolutions.
GOLD STAR for me!
So without further ado my resolutions for 2012
1. Do enough artwork to have a small show.
2. Go see the Orthopedic doctor
3. Get either some job/volunteer work to give myself more structure.
4. Lose 20 more pounds (I've lost 20 last year).
5. Get either an Illustration certification or going back to Texas State for the second part of my BFA. (Or both!)
6. Work towards becoming retired.
7. Go on some sort of vacation!
Check back with me throughout the year. I have very positive thoughts on this.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
New photos
I bought myself an early Christmas present this year. During taking my visual graphics class this semester, we were allowed to use the school cameras - handy little Fujifilm Finepix S3300. I really liked them and since I opened my ETSY account had been using the little Nikkon Coolpix. (That's a nice little camera as well) So after consulting with the SO, I decided to spend a little cash and get it for me. It was on sale and I can use it for shop photos.
I just love it. of course right after I bought it I was forced to stay indoors for th emost part because of the crutches and not being able to do a bunch in wet rainy weather with lots of cement walkways and such.
Today, however, was beautiful and I decided to try the back yard. It's a blast. So here are the backyard plants (who are doing quite well with all this nice slow steady rain we've been having) and a trellis....
I think the shots turned out pretty good. I need to practise more but the zoom is totally wonderful. I'm going to take some of the jewelry I've been making and photograph it outside. More shots later!
Thursday, December 1, 2011
On this the beginning of the year
Today is somewhat of a high point, I suppose. Today or this morning at around 10:39 Pacific Standard Time I was born in a town near Los Angeles. Not a big hoopla really for anyone but me but it did encourage me to become a little thoughtful and reflective (are these two different actions or one)
I don't remember much in terms of my young life. I know I was born and spent my early days in Culver City near MGM studios where my father worked. I was the youngest of three sibs. Two older brothers.
One of my earliest memories though is the Easter Bunny who I swear I saw one morning. My bedroom was in the front of the house and I had a set of double french doors that led to the front or living room. I remember waking up Easter morning early (before dawn) and seeing the Easter Bunny. A rather tall fellow with a pink bow around his neck and was holding holding a basket. The Bunny turned around and held its finger to its lips - telling me to be quiet. His being there was out secret. I remember this vividly the white fur, the little tail, the big pink bow... Strangely, I didn't receive my basket in my bedroom - it was always on the breakfast table, but the bunny came to see me in the room. That vision has never dimmed over the years.
I was told that when I was 4 or 5 I would get up early in the morning and sit on the curb in front of the house. (No mean feat - since the yard was long and our house sat back to the rear of the lot). I would get up, sit on the curb and sit away - just singing the sun up. To this day I still sing to myself, to cheer myself up, to express joy. I'm not the most talented singer although I can sing and have a pleasant voice but it stays a really private gift to myself. I do however sing more in the bath tub than the curb although I have been known to sing on the front porch. I no longer get up at 5 in the morning to sing. Age does bring wisdom.
I remember the time my brother ate grapes in front of me and wouldn't share. I still don't eat grapes much although that is more to Caesar Chavez rather than my brother. I remember trying to bury the duck in a hole. This was totally by accident since we were originally trying to dig a duck pond fill it with water to give the duck a swimming hole. No one told small children that they had to line the pond first - the resulting muddy hole caused the duck to almost succumb. My mother rescued it and we got in a great deal of trouble.
Holes and mud seem to figure prominently in my youth. When older and at a different house we flooded the flower bed outside the bedroom window and took turns jumping out the window into the mud. Totally killed the begonias and again raised my mother's ire. I have lingering guilt about the horrid things we did to my mothers flowers. She died when I was young so that may have encouraged that feeling of guilt.
I remember learning to read and loving the whole process of reading. My grandmother gave us politically incorrect Southern readers from the '20's to brush up or reading skills. While the childrens names escape me - not Dick and Jane - I remember the books were illustrated with photos of the period. Picking cotton looked fun to me . (I told you they were politically incorrect.) Growing up in Southern California with a family based originally in Texas had it's charms.
So what then does 60 mean to me? I'm not sure. Mentally I don't feel 60, although my body is being difficult these days and not working it's best. I have a strong interest in learning. I love finding new things to keep me thinking and want to learn more. I've learned to be comfortable with myself which I couldn't do when I was younger. I've accepted my shortcomings and still try to resolve the issues they bring. I try to understand myself and learn to forgive myself my flaws. But I don't feel old except the rare times the bionic leg starts hurting more than usual or a twinge suddenly makes me long for younger bones.
But suddenly I am older - older than 59 and yet younger than 70. With the exception of my mother, the women in my family are long lived so I hope that I will be the same way. My grandmother died when 89, my one aunt in her '80's I think as did my great aunt. My other aunt is hale and hearty. So I hope I live as long as they do. I still have things I want to finish and times not waiting.
So I give myself this birthday wish and that is to be happy and accomplish something this year and the year after and the year after that. To not be idle and to keep going. Happy Birthday to me.
I don't remember much in terms of my young life. I know I was born and spent my early days in Culver City near MGM studios where my father worked. I was the youngest of three sibs. Two older brothers.
One of my earliest memories though is the Easter Bunny who I swear I saw one morning. My bedroom was in the front of the house and I had a set of double french doors that led to the front or living room. I remember waking up Easter morning early (before dawn) and seeing the Easter Bunny. A rather tall fellow with a pink bow around his neck and was holding holding a basket. The Bunny turned around and held its finger to its lips - telling me to be quiet. His being there was out secret. I remember this vividly the white fur, the little tail, the big pink bow... Strangely, I didn't receive my basket in my bedroom - it was always on the breakfast table, but the bunny came to see me in the room. That vision has never dimmed over the years.
I was told that when I was 4 or 5 I would get up early in the morning and sit on the curb in front of the house. (No mean feat - since the yard was long and our house sat back to the rear of the lot). I would get up, sit on the curb and sit away - just singing the sun up. To this day I still sing to myself, to cheer myself up, to express joy. I'm not the most talented singer although I can sing and have a pleasant voice but it stays a really private gift to myself. I do however sing more in the bath tub than the curb although I have been known to sing on the front porch. I no longer get up at 5 in the morning to sing. Age does bring wisdom.
I remember the time my brother ate grapes in front of me and wouldn't share. I still don't eat grapes much although that is more to Caesar Chavez rather than my brother. I remember trying to bury the duck in a hole. This was totally by accident since we were originally trying to dig a duck pond fill it with water to give the duck a swimming hole. No one told small children that they had to line the pond first - the resulting muddy hole caused the duck to almost succumb. My mother rescued it and we got in a great deal of trouble.
Holes and mud seem to figure prominently in my youth. When older and at a different house we flooded the flower bed outside the bedroom window and took turns jumping out the window into the mud. Totally killed the begonias and again raised my mother's ire. I have lingering guilt about the horrid things we did to my mothers flowers. She died when I was young so that may have encouraged that feeling of guilt.
I remember learning to read and loving the whole process of reading. My grandmother gave us politically incorrect Southern readers from the '20's to brush up or reading skills. While the childrens names escape me - not Dick and Jane - I remember the books were illustrated with photos of the period. Picking cotton looked fun to me . (I told you they were politically incorrect.) Growing up in Southern California with a family based originally in Texas had it's charms.
So what then does 60 mean to me? I'm not sure. Mentally I don't feel 60, although my body is being difficult these days and not working it's best. I have a strong interest in learning. I love finding new things to keep me thinking and want to learn more. I've learned to be comfortable with myself which I couldn't do when I was younger. I've accepted my shortcomings and still try to resolve the issues they bring. I try to understand myself and learn to forgive myself my flaws. But I don't feel old except the rare times the bionic leg starts hurting more than usual or a twinge suddenly makes me long for younger bones.
But suddenly I am older - older than 59 and yet younger than 70. With the exception of my mother, the women in my family are long lived so I hope that I will be the same way. My grandmother died when 89, my one aunt in her '80's I think as did my great aunt. My other aunt is hale and hearty. So I hope I live as long as they do. I still have things I want to finish and times not waiting.
So I give myself this birthday wish and that is to be happy and accomplish something this year and the year after and the year after that. To not be idle and to keep going. Happy Birthday to me.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Giving Thanks
I've been finding stray bits of information here and there about Thanksgiving - or giving Thanks or Gathering Day. It seems that everyone seems to have a day of Thanksgiving which I find positive. Generally I get a random thought and then things start popping up - what Carl Jung called synchronicity. Because of all the thoughts on giving Thanks I found myself wandering around getting distracted from actual artwork this week.
It's by Gerald Manley Hopkins,(1844-1889) a British poet who converted to Roman Catholicism, studying to become a Jesuit priest which caused him a considerable amount of conflicting feelings about his poetry, himself and his beliefs. After reading of the death of 5 nuns aboard a ship he began writing again but his poems weren't released until after his death in 1889. He is most famous for what is called sprung rhythm.
Most of Hopkins work was published after his dead by his best friend Robert Bridges, who was poet laureate of England. The few poems that exist before the Jesuit days seemed to have been saved by Bridges. Hopkins had sent them to him.
So that is my Thanksgiving gift to you - May you find joy in what is around you.
I started rereading some poetry which is actually slow going for me. Often I get lost in the rhythm and rhyme of the thing and lose the trains of thought. (It's why I read them out loud in the bathtub - I do better hearing it.) One of the poems I thought to include here today even though it's not particularly a Thanksgiving poem. (Well, I think for me it is.)
It's by Gerald Manley Hopkins,(1844-1889) a British poet who converted to Roman Catholicism, studying to become a Jesuit priest which caused him a considerable amount of conflicting feelings about his poetry, himself and his beliefs. After reading of the death of 5 nuns aboard a ship he began writing again but his poems weren't released until after his death in 1889. He is most famous for what is called sprung rhythm.
GLORY be to God for dappled things—
For skies of couple-colour as a brinded cow;
For skies of couple-colour as a brinded cow;
For rose-moles all in stipple upon trout that swim;
Fresh-firecoal chestnut-falls; finches’ wings;
Landscape plotted and pieced—fold, fallow, and plough;
And áll trádes, their gear and tackle and trim.
And áll trádes, their gear and tackle and trim.
All things counter, original, spare, strange;
Whatever is fickle, freckled (who knows how?)
With swift, slow; sweet, sour; adazzle, dim;
He fathers-forth whose beauty is past change:
Praise him.
Praise him.
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| Hopkins |
He's unique in that he's considered a modern poet because of this sprung rhythm which is closer to Anglo-Saxon and early English poetry rather than the structured meter in regular poetry. It has to do with the stress of the first syllable of a foot. Hopkins was strongly attracted to language and studied Old English, considering it a vast improvement to the more modern polyglot language. He also was influenced by Welsh poetry with it's use of similar sounds, the same sound repeating several times in a line. His poetry is best when read out loud (great bath tub reading for me).
Most of Hopkins work was published after his dead by his best friend Robert Bridges, who was poet laureate of England. The few poems that exist before the Jesuit days seemed to have been saved by Bridges. Hopkins had sent them to him.
So that is my Thanksgiving gift to you - May you find joy in what is around you.
Friday, November 4, 2011
Survivors
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| sage - close up |
I'm making myself get out to exercise in small doses. So today I picked up the camera and went looking in the backyard to see what survived the drought and neglect. I used to have a garden. Somewhat chaotic - like me. Squirrels would tear out the little tomatoes, take a bite and decide green tomatoes just weren't tasty. Everything ate the chard. The herbs did well until the heat and then they sank into maintenance.
So I wasn't expecting a single thing. Surprise, surprise! Nature is hardy. My garden or culinary sage is going great guns! I think it's the Biedermeister variety. Large leafed and tolerant of the high heat, high humidity we have in the summer. It's thriving. A tiny bit of it got sacrificed for dinner tonight but I think it will survive.
Then the rosemary (three different kinds) is also thriving. It's happy as pie in what I used to call the Mediterranean garden since it rarely got watered was somewhat rocky and very sunny. Someone once told me that the Texas Hill Country is very similar to the Mediterranean area. I can agree based on the herbs here. The rosemary and the sage grow side by side. I also found a tiny plant of Salvia Greggii - which isn't a bit culinary but has nice flowers. It didn't do so well but I found it and some remains of the German Irises still holding on.
I think Rosemary remains my favorite herb. I really love it. Earlier this summer, I had cut some for cooking and left it in a cup of water on the sink and it seems to have rooted. I'm going to try to transplant it into a pot and see if it grows. The whole yard could fill with rosemary and I wouldn't mind in the slightest (The bees would like it as well) Besides these leftovers I had various introduced plants... or what I I could refer to as the birds garden. Most of these have come from seeds left by the birds. I love the lantana and it will bloom until the very last minute. Somewhere I have the paler variety but I love the brightness of the blooms so much.
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Lantana
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We also have a wild grape that a neighbor shares with us. It's never produced grapes but does have blooms. This year I really thought it had died but no I found small branches with grape leaves growing. It trails along one of the fallen trees we've never cut down. I was sitting on one when the resident woodpecker started complaining I was out and about. I hadn't seen him be so active and quite so vocal before.
Among things I didn't find a good place to snap a photo were Wild petunias and Pigeonberry which does very well in our yard. Pigeon berry reminds me of dock just smaller and tinier.
I did find a really nice set of tiny little amaranth - I am not certain what kind it is but the sun really lit it's spire. I found several small colonies. When I plant garden amaranth it just won't grow but the wild variety does well in my yard. Not certain exactly why.
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| wild amaranth |
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